Wednesday, 19 February 2014

Coping with the 'frequency' change when TTC

If you're not interested in questions about baby making, look away now!

Being Valentine's Day, hubby and I were 'practicing' baby making the other night, and afterwards it got me to thinking... Due to a whole lot of factors that I won't be going into here, we have never had a regular schedule, just an understanding that once a week is the minimum we (...I) am willing to settle for. Some weeks it's more than that, others only barely, but obviously for maximum baby making efficiency, this is going to have to change!

I have heard others talk about the struggle to keep things seductive, spontaneous or even just relaxed. I have even read on forums about people whose hubbys suffer ED during this time due to the added stress, expectation, etc. I've read about men who feel like their partners see them as baby making machines and nothing more.

Hubby has already mentioned that he's not sure he's going to be able to 'keep up' and wondered how long it might take, and I am not sure if the comments from his co-worker about him being tired for the rest of his life are really helping! I am trying to be supportive and show him all the evidence which says once every 2-3 days is the best way to go for sperm number, quality, etc but I think that if we find that the first two or three months are uneventful then I am going to have to start paying super close attention to my cycle so we can just schedule the days that are going to be most effective!

I'd love to know how other people cope, especially men, but it's not really a conversation that happens all that often in the real world. I'd love to know if there is anything I can so or do to make the experience a little more enjoyable for hubby, besides the obvious.

Less than  two weeks to go till all this becomes reality rather than theory, so I guess we'll see!


  1. In general ww don't have a set day/amount for special time but it tends to be every Sunday or second sunday. I worry how we'll go trying for three times in five days minimum while baby making! Figure we'll give it a go and what happens, happens. Goodluck :)

    1. Thanks for taking the time to share your experiences, seems like you have a big change coming up. I'm sure you'll work it out together.

      We're only a few weeks in, but so far so good! There have been a few nights when the first thing hubby has said when he gets home is how he's too tired, etc... but later that night he's changed his mind.

      All the best! =]